Shoulda Coulda Woulda

"It is never too late to be what you might have been." George Eliot

Funny. As I was sitting on the bike at physical therapy yesterday, I looked up at the office white board and saw this "quote of the day". I had seen this quote before...heck I have probably shared this with friends. But I never really let it sink in. Think for a moment how absolutely true this quote is!

Quick backstory...teaching is my third career. It's my first love, but my third career. When I became a teacher, so many of my friends and family came out of the woodwork and congratulated me for finally pursuing my dream of becoming a teacher. It was exciting and scary and I haven't regretted it. Have I questioned it? I have my moments (it's a tough job let's be honest here!)

Several months ago, I read an interesting article that talked about words or phrases we need to avoid within our day-to-day conversations. One was "should have", one was "could have" and another, of course, was "would have". The old shoulda coulda woulda mentality.

Guess what? Newsflash. Yesterday is history. OVER. You can sit there and let it fester, let it swirl around, allow it to take over and blind you from the present. You can never change it. All you can do is learn from it and move on. Be better by it and be happier by it! You figured it out! How exciting right?

It doesn't matter if you feel that you've spent years in the wrong place...maybe you need to shift your thinking just a smidge. Maybe the place you have been is the launching pad...the stepping stone...the bridge to your future greatness. The journey is still yours.

Hey, I shoulda coulda woulda done many things differently; thinking that way will only cause me to question all that I have and all that I have become. And most importantly, it may cause me to miss this awesome thing called life happening right before my eyes.

Put your hand on your chest and feel that heart beating! You have purpose and meaning and a role in this "play". Act it out. Walk it out. Be the very best YOU can be...everyday.

It's perfectly fine...

It's perfectly fine that I came home at 7pm, put on my pajamas and sat in front of the television.
It's perfectly fine that my laundry is running down the hall, dying to be washed.
And you bet your butt, it's perfectly fine I had cereal for dinner!

In a world of constant expectation and continuous disappointment, it's freeing to throw caution to the wind and just choose to not be perfect. At 42 (yes, can you believe it?), this is MY year. I have amazing children who love me (even if they don't like me sometimes), bought a house on my own, co-coached a baseball team with great friends, have found contentment and peace within a loving relationship, have amazing students constantly surrounding me along with some pretty great colleagues...and oh my friends...my pillars!

My advice to you? Stop trying to impress others. Stop trading status for state of mind. Be blessed. Be happy. Just BE!

If you find that you are comparing yourself to others, STOP. Your story is unique; your walk is your own.
Your journey is just that...YOUR JOURNEY.

It's perfectly fine to forgive the supposed "unforgivable" (isn't that what God does every day?!)
It's perfectly fine to be happy for those that have hurt you. Let them be happy. Maybe they won't hurt anyone else.
It's perfectly fine to be alone and it's perfectly fine to be in a relationship....the point is...do what YOU want. I have said this dozens of time and I continue to say it...you are given one life with an ability to give lots of love and experience endless opportunity so don't flipping waste it.
Be perfectly fine with not being perfect.

*This post is dedicated to Chloe Jennings...who has inspired me to "pick up" my blog again and start writing. Thank you Chloe...I love you and respect you oodles!!