The Invisible Thief

My last post was January 25th, 2020. Maybe inexcusable in the mind of a writer, but understandable considering the great robbery of 2020. Our peace of mind...our livelihoods...our sanity...our ability to BE with people we love and care for...stolen by an invisible thief...fear.

You probably thought I would say COVID-19, right? Well, COVID-19 is more visible than fear...than worry...than silence. It's all over the news, the internet, and it's all over people's faces. But the fear that it has created around the globe is an invisible force that is consuming peace and tranquility like the fiery melting hot lava of an angry volcano that has been dormant for thousands of years. Taking precaution versus throwing caution to the wind...judging eyes everywhere...wearing your mask has become not only a point of conversation, but a point of fashion. Smiles covered by team logos, fun images of our favorite things, or just a temporaray throwaway guard that helps keep us safe. Where is the mask for our mind? The mask that guards our minds against the unraveling...the restlessness...the fear?

One of my favorite quotes is actually from a movie...Fantastic Beasts. "Worrying means you suffer twice" - Newt Scamander. All the time we spend worrying, we never ever get back. And don't for one minute think I am underestimating what is happening and what COVID-19 truly is...it's real, it is a scary, unpredictable virus that affects everyone differently. How can we battle such fear? Such worry? Isolating ourselves and losing sleep (with our minds as well) is what the fear wants...we must have hope.

It's a miraculous thing when a flower will find a crack through the thickest part of the cement. A drop of water and just a hint of light and a flower can bloom. If this tiny flower can find the light, we will as well. We will persevere. We will rise and overcome. Heading into 2021, we are a different world. How we approach every single minute is up to us, and we must embrace hope with an expectation and an appreciation of what we have! The great things we hope to happen is the best New Year's resolution we can make. Take what we know, follow our hearts, and apply it to what we want. Cheers to 2021!

20/20 Vision

It's interesting to read people's resolutions and reflections of a year to come and the year forever behind us. Me, being somewhat "teacher minded", saw the irony in this year...2020...20/20 vision is known as perfect vision. No glasses needed! I am going into this year...the final year of a decade (and yes, 2020 is not the beginning of a new decade, but the end of one) reflective and knowing that my moments of despair and brokenness were just moments of growth and opportunity leading down to the road of hope and renewal.

I am weeping with hope today. I look back at the last 10 years...not just one...and go "WHOAH Tiff...how did you get up and go? How did you get up and survive? And smile?"

2010 to 2019...another divorce...moving around a bunch...heartache that could have filled a stadium...lost friends...but still...I got up and kept going. I bought a house all on my own in 2016, finally giving me and my kids a place to call home...permanently. I finally followed my passion to teach...leaving a very lucrative sales job behind. I made tons of mistakes and cried a lot of tears...rivers, let me tell you! I look into the faces of my students...day after day...week after week...year after year and I know I did the right thing.

We are so quick to point out the faults when we look at ourselves. Mirrors don't lie, do they? But the voices in our heads often deceive us.
Grab a mirror...and look into your eyes...not anything else. Your eyes have seen things, processed things, cried, dreamed, and they have "smiled". We are imperfect people, but we have something that is always perfect. Our ability to love and forgive and move on. This ability is often shadowed or hindered by hurt and doubt, but once revealed, it is unstoppable.

My heart is beating again. My vision for me and for my children and for those that I love and care for is 20/20. Believe that good will happen and it will. Open your heart. And be the very best person you can every day.