The Sun Still Rises

The Sun Still Rises

The sun still rises
even when you have a broken heart
The world keeps spinning
even when you don't know where to start

The sun travels the azure sky
ever so wonderfully from east to west
You peek outside the window
but all your body craves is quiet rest

A broken heart is real
and can be the result of many things
Can be death, or betrayal, or
a loss of souls to queens and kings

As days and weeks slowly pass
one wonders can a fractured heart ever mend
when you wake up each new day
and just pray for it to come to a silent end

The sun still rises
even when you have a broken heart
But one day you will awaken
and want to make a brand new start

The sun so beautifully sets
especially when you have healed
You wistfully take in all of its glory
as your renewed brightened spirit is revealed.

"He heals the wounds of every shattered heart" Psalms 147:3

Taking chances...

It has been a bit since my last post; I won't apologize as I only blog when my mind allows. Which means, my mind has not allowed much as of late. Life has caught up with me, and it has caught up with me HARD. One day at a time is what I can deal with right now. Sometimes, just an hour at a time. My soul and heart are in a bit of turmoil but I know that it only means something GREAT is going to happen.

I have taken a lot of chances in my life. Some have ended wonderfully, some have ended terribly, but all have ended with me growing and learning and understanding myself more. Isn't that what it's about? Personal growth? If we don't have takeaways from each experience, we stall in our growth. Our beings are constant works in progress...daily...weekly...yearly works in progress. Every single day we learn a little bit more about ourselves; how we handle conflict, how we handle accomplishments, and how we handle heartbreak.

2019 is a promised year for me; a promised year of growth, taking chances, and moving forward. Resting my mind when things become overwhelming, hibernating when I need to regroup, and experiencing new things on my own. Being a great mom, engaged and open-minded to my children's needs and wants, is an important goal for me. Making decisions that I feel will best suit me and them. Becoming wiser in my journey by truly taking in all of life's circumstances, and process them and make them make sense for me. Remember, regret is a place we shall not dwell in...but a place we can always learn and grow from. Take a moment and reflect on your life and all the choices and chances you took and think about where you are today. The idea of consequence may come to mind, but in all things, and all the mistakes you made...you learned, you grew, and you became wiser.

"To acquire wisdom is to love yourself; people who cherish understanding will prosper." - Proverbs 19:8

Life is like a Rubik's Cube

Recently, my son has taken an affinity to the Rubik's Cube. Maybe it's a fad...but it has kept his attention nearly as well as his Xbox. It arrived neat in it's package and he was so excited. He almost didn't want to "screw it up" by messing with it as all of the colors were neatly lined up and matched.

Well, curiosity got the better of him, and he went at it. Mixing it up, trying new ways to get it back to it's original perfection. To no avail, after hours of listening to him in his room, the backseat of our car, and any other spot he could find to have at it, it remains a mismatched mess. And for now, he's put it down; in his words "to think about how he can get it back".

Of course, my ever-busy mind started thinking about how this Rubik's Cube can be compared to life. We start out new, matched, not-fractured...whole. Life's happenings twist us all about and can often make a mess...and we are left all "screwed up". Or are we?

We frantically search for ways to repair ourselves, better our souls, replenish what was lost...
I remember asking myself, "How did I get here? Where did I go wrong?" Self-help books, endless podcasts, uplifting memes and Pinterest posts string us along with a belief that we can truly help ourselves get back to good...whole...anew. Maybe just shifting our thoughts by just a little, we can stop beating ourselves up, improve our outlook on life and not get "back to good" but "move forward to better"?

What if you just accepted where you are...don't say you have...but BELIEVE that you are exactly where you are supposed to be no matter what your past whispers in your ear?
Every single day you are given a chance to speak kindness onto someone, smile through this life journey that, FYI, EVERYONE is on, and get wiser by the moment. And here's an eye-opener for you:
You may learn something new. Growth...change...it's uncomfortable. But our minds are boundless and have the ability to adapt and look at things through a different lens.

No...there really isn't a life manual to get back to good. My son asked me to order this on Amazon, but then he found a YouTuber who showed him how to do it, step by step, and what to do when he hit a wall. His spirits were lifted, and even though the Rubik's Cube was back to its original matched state, he went and messed it up again to challenge himself to solve it on his own.
I learn a lot from reading, writing, music...but I learn most from my children. Their fearless attempts at life inspire me to do the same.
Go buy yourself a Rubik's Cube and mess it up and see what it does for your mind!

Maybe it's time...

Do you let your past steal from your future? This post's title is named after a song from the recent remake of A Star Is Born.
Don't worry...I'm not going to spoil it for you if you haven't had the pleasure of seeing this fantastic movie. However, I will share the message I walked away with. We all have a past, whether it's laden with deep-rooted fears, hurts, or mistakes. With this being said, don't EVER let the past steal from your future. It's so easy to do.

"Maybe it's time to let the old ways die...
It takes a lot to change a man
Hell, it takes a lot to try
Maybe it's time to let the old ways die"

(Link to complete song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cz0qhCWl1o4)

Opening lyrics but incredible advice. The song goes on to share about underlying religious beliefs, talking to God, and how difficult it can be to truly let the old ways die.

Standing in the mirror, looking at myself, I used to see the flaws, the sadness in my eyes, and the lingering hurt in my soul. Many sleepless nights where I allowed my mind to run away; patterns repeated because they were safe and a known path.

No where on this mind map does it say REGRET, DISAPPOINTMENT, JUDGEMENT, BLAME, HATE, or FAILURE. Think about these questions for a minute or two...

How many mistakes have you made?
How many hurtful words have you spoken?
How many times have you wished to be in a different place?
And, how much time have you wasted on things you cannot change?

You cannot change the past. You can only learn from it and change how you move forward. Simply said, yes, but definitely not simply done. Every day for me is a walk of faith. Waking up, and putting my feet on the floor and being 100% convinced that God has given me another day to live, to love, to make a difference, and to learn something new.

Are some days harder than others? Yes! But those hard days make the great days even greater. It can be so easy to become overwhelmed and wrap ourselves up with the safe blanket of our past; it's warm, it's disturbingly comfortable but it will suffocate you, your growth, and your future.

As Spock so dutifully quoted in every Star Trek flick: "Live long and prosper."

Tell me something good...

2018 is gone. And as thankful I am to have survived another year on this earth, I feel in 2018, that's what I did. Survive. Several joyful moments..yes...that were clouded by many moments of self-doubt, heartache, and voids. Prayers unanswered. The question, "how did I get here?" played in my mind over and over and over again.

My goal for this year, and the many years after this one, is to be present and love my life.

I want to open my mind wide to new opportunities, open my heart to new possibilities and thrive, not just survive. I want the old wounds to close and heal. My heart is ready for great things.

I attended a celebration of life recently...it was such a tragically beautiful day. So much love was present amongst many people; people who had traveled near and far to share, and it is times such as these that make us wonder why it takes such tragedy to realize what is truly important.

Love is all encompassing. Love is the undercurrent of all existence. It can cover bitterness, hatred, disappointment, and can bring about peace. I am challenging myself to find the positive in everything, to share something relevant, and tell others something good to enhance their day. The cliche "a smile can change someone's day" is so true, especially in our world today.

Today, as I watch the warm January rain wash over my house, it's seemingly washing away the lingering dirt of a year that is forever behind me; lessons of struggle, misjudgment, loneliness and sadness.

2019 is not just a new year, but signifies new hope. Good things will happen.
Be the good, until you're living your best life.

Give yourself a damn minute!

This life is absolutely crazy. We crave for simple, yet we fill our plates with things to make us feel more important, more necessary, just MORE.

The best way I can explain how I am feeling today is, when I reflect and look back on pictures of "younger me", I wish I could have told "younger me" slow down, Tiffany. Take this moment in because soon, you will be working 3+ jobs to keep your head above water, barely holding it together when everyone just thinks you're so strong and all you want to do is just breathe for a minute without worrying about the mortgage, the broken toilet, the overgrown grass, the empty refrigerator...are ya getting where I am going?

My focus this year: Balance. Not just physical balance (which, in actuality, a little celebration here...I'm down 23 pounds since January 5th and feel fantastic!), but emotional and life balance. FOMO, a.k.a. fear of missing out, had to go to the waist side. I needed to focus on getting myself in a place where I could choose what mattered, take time for me, truly grasp what my kids needed from ME, and on the flip side, what I needed from THEM.

Not only did I begin a very simple gratitude journal, I truly started taking note of what did matter. There are so many things we wrongly believe we can control but we cannot. We actually control very little, and realizing that in itself will change your thinking almost immediately. When any crisis hits, ask yourself: "Will this matter a day from now? A week from now? A year?" These questions alone will help you prioritize and work through crises more effectively, as well as open the door for healing. In my daily journey, I look around and see where I can improve, where I can change, and where I can inspire. Those are things I can control. How I respond to all challenges is 100% up to me. How others behave, what others do, and all of life's happenings are things none of us can control. So, give yourself a damn minute! Allow yourself a lazy moment. Say "no" or say "yes" but, say it with the knowledge that it is in your best interest.

My simple list of 9 (ongoing work in progress):
1. Wake up and thank God you did.
2. Open the blinds and look outside to a brand new day.
3. Hug your family and kids when you can.
4. Remind yourself and them that no matter what the day brings, you love them and cherish them.
5. Be proactive in your emotional and physical health.
6. Forgive yourself. Forgive others.
7. Embrace that everything is temporary; success as well as failure.
8. Discover your talents and use them.
9. Follow your instincts, and don't allow fear to block your journey to greatness.


Thus says the LORD:”Stand by the roads, and look, and ask for the ancient paths, where the good way is; and walk in it, and find rest for your souls."
~Jeremiah 6:16

Don't Be Comfortable With Failure

The dead end job.
The going-nowhere relationship.
The one-sided friendships that are ever-draining.
Waking up, doing what you need to do...not what you want to do...and going to bed. Repeat.
Not trying anything new...never extending yourself outside of the dreaded comfort zone.

From "The Myth of Being Comfortable" Don't get comfortable with failure, discomfort is a precursor for growth. Learn to not fear discomfort.

One of my goals with this blog is to reiterate that we should be thriving and not JUST surviving.

In my last blog post "Triggers", I touched upon how we will revisit and repeat patterns because of a comfort level; satisfaction and happiness levels fall to the waist side. Another round of failures bury us deeper into a comfortable failure philosophy. Similar to a toxic cycle, this philosophy is tough to break free from. We linger, we hope for change, and we continue down a dead end path with the utmost optimism, until those ongoing failings chip away at an already damaged spirit, and we are left cycling and questioning everything.

Fear can be crippling. Fear of moving forward. Closing the door and not looking back. Letting go is one of the hardest things for a human being to do. We have this immortality perception and innately, we struggle with things ending.

Losing yourself is the absolute worse result of not letting go to things in life that are not right for you. People, places, things...we will often cling so tightly that we lose grip on what's important. Our inner peace. Our inner spirit. Our drive to do better, want better and live better.

Where do you start?
Well, I started with 3 steps and I repeat them EVERY DAY.
I'm a month in to this, and every day, I am stronger. I am more centered. I am more me.

1. Set your alarm in the morning to include a positive message.
Mine says "Good Morning Amazing Woman!" (got this idea from one of my dearest friends JVB - not sure if I even told her so thank you friend!)

2. Yesterday and all its worth is behind us. The victories and failures. Let it go.
Today is a gift. Let your presence be felt in the present.

3. Forgive yourself. Everyday. We are imperfect people. We are incredible, amazing God-inspired, beautiful, emotion-filled imperfect people.
Look in the mirror, say it out loud, believe it and live your life.


Joshua 1:9
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.